the next best thing..

The next best thing since God knows when or as much as my memories serves me, has just happened on me. I love you.

looking fine on the outside.

but am I really fine on the inside? =)

hello once again, you.

haven't typed anything in a uber long time and the sudden remembrance of the existence of this blog, I've decided to come back here again to clean up all the cobwebs and dust that has probably settled on my page.

Now, where should I start? Probably with work first. Work's been good..getting paid, spending, saving etc etc. Made new friends, gained new brothers, have current brothers working with me. Life's pretty much exciting.

Anyway, the reason for blogging today is because I'd actually like to know, when was the last time you ever felt threatened? or felt secondary? or not-so-important?

because i felt this way today.

and you can't wait to fall in love...with me..this just can't be summer love, we'll see.

ohh and once again we are in the middle of the year! the month of June. Haven't been updating in the longest of times. Well, my job's been mundane, working, OT-ing, clubbing, drinking, getting drunk, sleeping in void decks (oops)..but yeah, at least my life has been really enriching nowadays. Life without you wasn't exactly so bad either.  At least I survived; and two of my brothers are working in the same place as me. LALALAAAA..

update again.
\

April 2010 closing post

Well, an blink of an eye and 1 month has once again passed by. Well, have been busy ever since started my new job 2 weeks ago. Work's not too bad, new people, new faces. They've been really helpful and stuffs like that. Also been catching up with L, J, S.sis, N, Jojo and all the other common faces that you've probably seen somewhere on my blog but I failed to mention.

P.s    - 11.11 wish. does it really come true?
P.p.s - 11.11 wish is for someone else.

i seek a peaceful mind, body, heart and soul..

if only everything meant anything.

March 2010 closing post.

Haven't visited blogger for close to a month. Well, I've been busy. With my company, with projects, with looking for a new job, in short, with everything. Haven't really been a great month, but at least I'm tiding over, and finally seeing the sunshine after the rain.

Been doing much photography recently, it certainly relaxes me.

nuff said; some previews.

I hope you remember.

This is what I want of us.

I truly want you to be that one and only always is, always will.

And that's the end of my post. If you enjoyed my photos, you could catch more of them on www.flickr.com/photos/chenwk. 

Have a great day everyone.

New distractions, new love.

and like what J.Low said, "& great financial loss".

But "it's inevitable."

P.s        - Jojo bestie asked if I could help her do photoshoot. Well, why not.

P.p.s     - You still made me tremble..and you made me miss you terribly much.
P.p.s     - Save up as much as possible for the things I want to buy!

simply picnic; Shanon's 22nd birthday

This post is dedicated to my silly Sister, Shanon.

I hope you had a great time on your birthday and I wish you all the best for everything.

Well, it was 27th Feburary 2010 and that was the day 22 years ago that my silly sister was brought to this place called Earth. So in order to mark this significant day, she decided to have a small gathering in a form of a picnic at Marina Barrage!

Without further ado, I shall let words do the resting and photos to do the talkings.

First, we kick off with the first photo of the day of the birthday girl!

I kind of liked this; kei.

After setting up base at the roof garden; Charlene, Lina, Jackie.

One of the shots I adored the most that day; Shanon.

her first meal of the day after a night of celebrations and early afternoon preparations for this picnic; S.

Give a warm welcome to the newest member to the group, baby Tiffany!

Yours Truly. A Shanon masterpiece; keith.

Lina looked so happy because this is her first actual gathering outing since she's given birth. And well, say hi to Stephanie too.

"Shanon, though it's your birthday, you also cannot bully a little girl by trying to snatch her drumstick to eat maa.."

This photo is so Edison.

I snap you, you snap me, we are one big family; Kei.

second out of six(?) shots that i adored the most that day; Randen.

Erica and DM.

Orh luhh orh luhh, don't cry don't cry; baby Tiffany.

it's no wonder they say a picture paints a thousand words; Stephanie, Edison.

is that a sign of growing confidence and maturity? ; S.

The new IR that is due to be done from constructions soon.

The Singapore Flyer; haven't been up in one yet though.

Third most adored photo of the day; J.Low;

signs of too much sabai sabai?; S.

fourth most adored photo, twist/victory in a nice backdrop; S.

After a long day, the birthday girl is tired already: S.

"I'm taking the Flyer luhh."; J.Low

Leo snapping all over with a nice backdrop.

Well, there are still plenty of photos, but I shall leave it like this. You guys know where to view the rest of the photos.

P.s      - Brothers and sister love you, S.

P.p.s   - Pained to see tears.

DSLR love; abstracts.

Well, didn't do much today, went to the temple with my grandma, grandaunts and my mum to pray today. After that, headed off to Golden Mile shopping centre for steamboat and chicken rice. Ohh man, how I missed the chicken rice there. It's so good!

After dinner, mum dropped me off at Kallang MRT and down I went, to Dhoby Ghaut to meet one of my long time no see buddy, L. We met up for some photography around Orchard. As usual, the NOOB me thought that there was something wrong with the lens but actually was because the viewfinder focus was ADJUSTED. Well, after all was set, we took some photos and here are some of the end products of the night.

self-explanatory, it's a sample shot.

Abstract shot taken by L; teaching me how to do such shots

Orchard Central when it's Golden.

We kept having errors with the lens while taking this shot, so this was a rare shot..

As mentioned, we kept having lens issue, so this was one of the test shots after cleaning..

So is this one...

After we were done snapping away, we headed to Heaven's Loft (Ben and Jerry's) to have some dessert. Partially cos it was me who had cravings for ice cream. While waiting after placing our orders..

I like this messed up feeling; probably cos it describes L and my feelings best..

After taking this photo, L and myself were looking at this and I went like "Hey, maybe this could be a photograph to warn people about drink-driving."

And the last photo of it all, when my dessert arrived..

For more of the photos, check them out on my facebook photos under the Abstract album. Well, nothing much to type now, so shall end here..

P.s       - I loved the breeze and the sunset at Riverside, Clark Quay.

P.p.s    - I trembled for the second time in a row when you appeared.

P.p.p.s - Happy Birthday to Ryan and Shanon!

who made me happy today?

Caught up with S for shopping at Plaza Singapura today. She went to get her stuffs for her sketch book and she bought a soft toy AGAIN (it's called Komo-kun)

After that swung by Lina's place and chilled..yakked and yakked, then fed baby Tiffany! Haven't fed a baby in a long long while already, skills rusted. but it was fun, and she looked so adorable when she was drinking her milk!

After feeding baby Tiffany, Lina's mum took over and brought her to sleep, and we continued our yakking. Suddenly we grew so bored that we started flaming each other on FB!~ too bad my phone ran out on battery on me, otherwise it'd been a big big funny FB flaming conversation. LOL!

S and myself left shortly after as Lina and Jackie needed to rest. Saw Shanon home and got home myself, did a little Friends Exposed and now typing this entry.

Well, ending it here now, but before that, Who made me happy today? Thanks S, and baby Tiffany, and Lina + Jackie. =)

P.s       - I hope one day you will tell me blue rose, so I know that it means I've got hope.
P.p.s    - I so wanted to put your name in plenty of Friends Exposed questions, but I don't have the courage..
P.p.p.s - Do you know that I am so worried about you? ily, imy, C.

you really can't save a damsel if she loves her distress?

Was on Queen D's blog, haven't read it for a long long while though. While scrolling down, this paragraph caught my eye. It goes like this..

I used to know this girl who gave her love away to every guy she met. & with all the games they played, she never seemed to cry, she never got upset. & one by one they came, & one by one they left. I thought that I could fix her if she would let me in. But all of my advances were shut down, in the end. When the days turned into months, I begged her to explain & this is what she sang: "It's not like I'm a slut, I just want every boy I see to walk away with a part of me until there's nothing left to hold, until there's nothing left to hate. I appreciate your help but even you can't save me from myself."



well, this certainly set my mind in motion. Though the situation that I think I'm in isn't that servere to this extent, but, is it really true that if a damsel loves her distress, there's no way that one can help to guide her on the correct path?
 
J. Low did once, mentioned to me, that there's a limit to how much rice you can grab in your hands, and this logic applies to life, there's only a certain limit to how you could help somebody.
 
All I know is, so long as its within my capability, I will try to guide you to the correct path.

To You

"Life isn't a fairytale, and I do not have a Harry Potter magic wand to work wonders to create that Disney's happily-ever-after ending. But what I do know is if time could go back, I'll fall for you over and over again, keep on trying and trying, in hopes that you will eventually like me back for just once."

my confessions.

There has been so much happening these few days. Everyday I wake up, having my mind fighting my heart, suppressing that feelings I have for you. I thought by breaking all contacts with you, I could spare myself the agony of having to decide whether its my heart to rule, or my mind to rule.

But that wasn't true, because for the 3600seconds each day, you are constantly on my mind. I know love can't be forced. I don't know how much of feelings you have for me, but what I do know is if even that feelings you have for me is 1%, 0.1% or maybe even 0.01%, so long as you are willing to try, i will do anything to the best of my ability to nurture that feeling.

This remaining time I have left in Singapore, before i further my studies, I want you to feel loved, make you the happiest girl in this world, make you feel like the queen. I keep saying I can't be selfish, because of my impending trip overseas, but I really wished I could, because that's how badly I want you to be in playing a role in my future.

All those things I've done for you, It'd be a lie that I don't have a motive. Every small thing I did for you, I hoped it might have moved you and perhaps it would make you have a slight change of heart towards me. But the main reason is because I just want you to be happy.

These words, are my heartfelt words. Maybe I've tried too hard.

but before I end off this post,
I love you, Cheryl.

(Our Love) Don't Throw It All Away

Maybe I don't wanna know the reason why

But lately you don't talk to me
And darling I can't see me in your eyes

I hold you near, but you're so far away
but let your love flow back to me
how can you leave and let this feeling die
(You alone)You alone are the living thing that keeps me alive
And tomorrow (tomorrow) if I'm here without your love
You know I can't survive
(Only my love)Only my love can raise you high above it all

Don't throw it all away, our love, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love, our love.
Don't throw it all away, our love.

We can take the darkness and make it full of light
But let your love flow back to me
How can you leave and let this feeling die?
(Happy room) This happy room would be a lonely place when you are gone
(And I)And I won't even have your shoulder for the crying on
(No other love) no other woman's love could be as true
I'm begging you

Don't throw it all away, our love, our love
Don't throw it all away, our love
Don't throw it all away, our love, our love
Don't throw it all away, our love

We changed the world we made
it ours to hold but dreams are made for those who really
try This losing you is real but I still feel you here
inside

Don't throw it all away, our love, our love
Don't throw it all away, our love(x6)

I'll hold onto your hands if you are afraid.

it's new years eve! but my day got spoilt first thing in the morning while at work..but shan't talk much about it since what's done cannot be undone.

went partying at butter fac yesterday, felt like ages since i stepped into a club. probably a sign of too much thai pubs/discos. hahah! saw plenty of familiar faces, saw a pretty (old) boy together with his lover (another old) boy..plenty of angmohs, some pretty chui looking guys and some really chui looking girls.

after butter, went for supper at swee choon AGAIN. quite fun. lol. Jensen was like taunting me all the way, so when we stopped at a traffic light with J.Low and my car side-by-side, Jensen still jokingly taunting, i actually got off the car and wanted to slap him. and damn, that really scared the (watery) shit out of him i guessed?

Hey Jensen, never expected that eh! and rem? mr Bean? LOL.

and that pretty much summed up the whole of ystd night. so till the next time, tata!

P.s    - sleeping thru NYE and NY.
P.p.s - don't do this again anymore?

i'm sorry to a millions of things.

stumbling on Dion's blog, I couldn't help but copy this out. but I'm going to do my own sets of modifications to it.

Dear Brain, Sorry for overloading you with the thoughts of her.

Dear Tummy, Sorry for all the butterflies.

Dear Pillow, Sorry for all those tears.

Dear Hand, Sorry for all the abusing of you against the walls.

finally,

Dear Heart, Sorry for all the heartaches and shatters.

Courtesy of Dion.

how different are we, when you and I are just the same?

I haven't been really really happy these few days..smile's fading, cheerfulness' fading..now i am just 皮笑， 肉不笑.. sometimes, i don't know. sometimes, i hope you'd open up and let me in, give it a try, letting me show you how deep my feelings are for you, believe in me and not write me off so quickly with reasons..so many sometimes....

your decision for someone else, haven't I been doing the same for you?

P.s    - i hate myself.
P.p.s - i need to go back to my reclusive self, practise what my name says, keeping emotions in the heart.

random - "ARGHHHHHHH"

as my blog title suggest, i feel like screaming it out to the sea, but it's 2.43am and I just got home and no way I am going to a beach to do that..so I guess my only way is to scream through text...

Another day of you me in paradise..

Lina, if you were thinking i won't blog, you're WRONG! Here's of course, my post..of words first..after all it's 7.46am in the morning.

anyway, I was in St John Island on Friday. Upon arrival at the island via ferry, I felt as though i was Robinson Crusoe for a day! I felt that I could almost die should I not have my netbook and my mobile phone with me.

unimportant, anyway, I headed off to the administrative office cos they had a network printer printing issue, so i was supposed to rectify it. But the users there actually told me that the problem was resolved! So having only two objectives to meet that day, in which one has been resolved, I was only left with asset checking of the IT equipments. So while at it, I was informed that ONLY that office i was in that day had all the IT equipments..now that's bad, cos that means I'd finish my work by like before lunchtime and I'll be left with nothing to do! Therefore i came with a conclusion to work slow so that I'd not die of boredom there.

(cont.)

P.s - 14 hrs 22 mins left @ 7.53am, 20/12/09..I'm officially missing you.